Sunday, December 20, 2009

Hi, is this...?

In the middle of a phone bank right now and I just spoke to someone who nearly made me cry. A woman in her late fifties was telling me this story of the best example why civil unions don't work. Her partner came down with an aggressive and rare form of cancer. Her employer fortunately offered health care benefits for civilly unioned partners, so she was able to get the treatment she needed. Unfortunately the treatment did not work. While at work, her partner collapsed while a the grocery store and was taken to the hospital. She arrived and tried to explain to the man behind the desk that they had a civil union. He would not let her back because she was not family. While she argued, presented papers and legal documents, her partner died.

Not having health care is a problem, but people can work themselves out of medical debt and these folks were fortunate where they were able to find an employer that recognized their union. Same-sex partners write up legal documents stating they have power of attorney over their partners. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But because this woman could not say that the person dying just down the hall was her wife, she died among strangers. There is no way to fix the civil unions law, there is no education campaign that can be waged to turn around the reality that this woman died alone and as a second class citizen while her partner argued and begged and pleaded just yards away.

Anyone who votes against the marriage equality bill out of religious belief, while wrong, can not be faulted. It is not their fault that they are not yet able to see past the idea that religious doctrine should not dictate civil laws. Trying to fix the civil union law will take so much more time, effort and resources than just saying yes to marriage. In Massachusetts, the divorce rate decreased after marriage equality arrived. In Vermont, they passed a civil union law and, finally, recently realized the law was insufficient.

Okay. Stepping down from the soap box and back to the phones.

2 comments:

  1. I have to respectfully disagree that people who vote against marriage equality because of their religious beliefs can't be faulted, because I believe that they should be. By that logic, we should choose one religion as the official one and make everyone follow that religion's beliefs. How about Catholicism? No divorce, no birth control, no abortions, no death penalty, no meat on Fridays during Lent. Oh, now people will complain. They want to impose their beliefs on gays and lesbians but don't want anyone to impose beliefs on them. Sorry, not ragging on you Evan, just tying to make a point. And thanks for you work on marriage equality. You probably don't hear that much, but many people appreciate what you do.

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  2. Hi, I am currently in a "straight" marriage while exploring my sexuality. I think same sex marriage is so important in allowing the gay world equal opportunity to strive towards being able to build a family unit.
    I was always of the view that I am not here to change society, simply to change the way I live in it, however I now realize this is not good enough. We can not simply follow the masses, and accept.

    Have a look at my blog if you like www.gayoncemeanthappy.blogspot.com

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